Dirty Dictionary Headings
Every time I look up a word in my "Prime Dictionary of American English" I can't help but smile. Occasionally, I even bust out laughing and my students insist on knowing what I find so funny about a dictionary. The problem is, sharing the words I find would probably cost me my job. I'm not even looking for dirty words, these are just the guide words at the top of each page:


The best of Korean Food

Name: Sam Gyap Sa
Ranking: 5/5
Cost: 10,000 (including lots of alcohol)
Description: Take thick cut slices of juicy canadian-like bacon and minus all the preservatives and sulphates. Throw the bacon on a sizzling hot cast iron, inverted-bowl, skillet and pile up the Kimchee around the bacon to act as grease-sponge. While waiting for the bacon, grill up some thick rings of onion, sliced garlic, peppers, potatoes, mushrooms and Dapoki noodles. Chow down on some zesty, green salad if you can find time to use chopsticks between manning the grill and pouring and drinking So-Ju


Name: Ho-Da
Ranking: 5/5
Cost: 500w
Description: Take the sweetest, gooiest bread dough, pack butter, brown sugar and sunflower seeds into the center and then deep-fry it.

Name: Unknown
Ranking: 5/5
Cost: 500w
Description: Take fortune cookie dough, roll it out and stamp it with a fancy design.

Ten times better than the stale, dusty bags of crumbled fortune cookies you by at the Wong’s corner store.

Downside: no fortune.
Korean Students Say the Darndest Things
Setting: Lets go three grammar class
Question: Fill in the blank with the appropriate verb. Did you __________ Mary on Sunday.
Student's Answer: Did you DO Mary on Sunday?
Correct Answer: Did you SEE Mary on Sunday?
--Contributed by Christa

Setting: Marking tests that my special, advanced morning class wrote.
Question: Use the word "old fashioned" in a sentence.
Answer: My grandmother taste old fashioned
What I assume she meant: My grandmother's tastes are old fashioned

Setting: Can You Believe It class: 8 high school students all around 16. Wayne and his best friend come up with a new game which involves insulting and threatening each other in English. I'm delighted and welcome the dialogue as it is rare from my students address each other in English.

Joe: You're without notion!
Wayne: Spontaneously I want hit your face!!!

Setting: Same class. Asked one of the girls to make a sentence using the idiom "to make an attempt".
Jasmine: I made my first attempt at touching his snake.
Me: *looking a little shocked.. and making a hissing sound and slithering motion with my arm* Where?
Jasmine: At Degu Zoo
Me: Good... good use of "attempt to"

Setting: Beginning of my Let's Go 4 class. I walk is and the 11 year old boy in front of Jane says:
Student: Jane, change head color!
I look at Jane's head and see she now has light brown streaks in her dark black hair.

Setting: Let's Go 5 Speaking Test
Student sees a picture of a girl sitting at a piano bench in front of a piano.
Question: What does she do in the evening?
Student's Answer: She plays IN the piano.

Setting: Let's GO speaking test.
Question: What did the girl do before she went to bed?
Top Answer: She brushed her house before she went to bed.
Correct Answer: She brushed her horse before she went to bed.

Question: Which boy is Jack?
Top Answer: He is the boy who is eating an Indian.
Correct Answer: He is the boy who is eating an Indian curry.